If you have a credit card and a healthy fear of exchange rate math (e.g. who cares what the euro is worth), Paris is a blessed escape from Calvinistic Geneva where I toil away (“toil” being a dramatic exaggeration).

NOTE: If you’re concerned that I don’t know how to correctly use “e.g.” and “i.e.,” you are correct. I had a boss once say that it was the only thing that he’d teach me. Clearly, it didn’t take.

Having returned from the city of lights, sitting in my overheated apartment stuck between an open-air terrace where college kids drink and a bar where, shockingly, college kids drink, I feel I may be romanticizing Paris a bit. Thus it’s time to make a list of all the ways in which Geneva is better than Paris.

ok, GO.

Umm… googling “Geneva” for some quick inspiration. please hold.

Ok, clearly Google is not contributing to this list.

I’ve dug deep, but below are my top 10 shining examples for why Geneva could take Paris in a UFC-style match. Little cities fight harder, and meaner. Paris won’t even be trying when this knock-out is registered.

1. Geneva has the loveliest tap water — really! Always fresh.
2. I always know what time it is in Geneva. Clocks abound!
3. Cheese! lots of it.
4. Geneva has one of the more relaxing train stations. No frantic running in circles as you only have two areas to choose from and they’re 50 meters apart.
5. You can’t get lost in a city that is centered around a lake in the middle. Everything is on one side or the other.
6. Genevans love to help with directions. Really. I’ve been asked more than once if I need help when I’ve stood for too long at a street corner.
7. You never see those pesky “50% off designer clothing sales” that Paris is plastered with.
8. You’re rarely tempted to buy Swiss clothing so your credit card thanks you.
9. Macaroons and patisseries don’t line the Geneva streets so your hips thank you. AND….
10. Paris is but a short train ride away so you can always jaunt there, even as you secretively know that it would *probably* be too much to live there.

sigh.

Eating lunch in the Louvre

Favorite things in the city of lights…

• Sugared lemon crepes
• Whipped cream crepes
• Buttered crepes
• People assuming that I could only speak English (no, really, I liked this)
• A man puking on the sidewalk without breaking stride while climbing up a huge hill in an, umm, interesting area
• Cezanne
• Monet
• Degas
• The scam where people pretend to find a “gold” ring on the sidewalk in front of you and then try to give it to you (apparently, Tony looks like their kinda guy)
• Tony’s umbrella exploding in front of the Arc de Triomphe (as in *literally* every piece of his umbrella separated and jumped in front of the insane traffic roundabout — I don’t think it could handle the shock either)
• Shoes
• Marais neighborhood
• Macaroons

Eiffel Tower at night

• Fixed menus (onion soup, farm chicken, tarte)
• Tourist traps
• Lines (actually, we skipped them all, but still…)
• Traveling via plane (yes, we were advised to take the train….)
• Latin Quarter restaurants (sorry!!)
• The price of macaroons (kid you not…. 3 euros for each little morsel)